Placement

We were asked to meet at the hospital around 2:00pm on Tuesday December 20th for placement. That was the longest day of our lives. We were of course very anxious and apprehensive about what to expect in the coming hours. The morning was spent making sure we had everything ready to go...carseat, diapers, formula, and bottles. Plus all our super important paperwork. That morning we had gotten a call from our Birth mothers Mom making sure we still wanted to go with the name we had picked out and the correct spelling of it so they could have it on the birth certificate. It was a relief to hear her voice and for her to tell us that our birth mother was doing okay.

The time finally came to go to the hospital. We met the caseworker in the lobby and he put us in a room to wait...and wait...and wait. The longer the wait, the more scarred I got. I knew deep down inside our Birth mother would not back out of placement....but I was still on pins and needles none the less. After all, we were so in love with this little girl. Some time passed and the caseworker came into our room. He had us sign some paperwork...and said "okay lets go." My fears were gone. I knew our birth mother had signed the necessary paperwork, and she was ours.

Again we found ourselves at the door to our birth mothers hospital room. Although this time it was a very different atmosphere. It was very quiet and everyone was sobbing. We didn't say much. It was hard to know what to say. There are no words in any language that could give the comfort that was so desperately needed. My extreme excitement was covered up due to the fact that I ached for this family. It was very difficult seeing these people we had grown to love so much hurting so badly. Some very tender moments were shared and then our birth mother placed our tiny baby in my arms.

"Here's your baby."

I don't think I had shed that many tears in a long time. We then carried our baby to the room we were previously put in and spent some time alone as a new family. The nurses then took us to the nursery and showed us how to care for a newborn and all that fun stuff new parents get to do. At six o'clock that night are little angel was discharged. We cautiously placed her in her car seat and buckled her into the car. We then drove "slowly" back to our hotel where we would stay until we would be able to go home. Typically adoptive parents are required to stay in the state they have adopted a child from for anywhere from 3 days to 2 weeks after placement. Well our second miracle happened on day 2.5 when our caseworker gave us the okay to bring our baby home. They really wanted to get us home for Christmas...a Christmas we will never forget. We were given the greatest gift...a gift that has enriched our lives, increased our faith, and united us as an eternal family.

Finally Arrived

Our baby's due date was December 24th. We really thought we had a good 4 weeks of preparing before our little lady would decide to make her grand entrance into this world. I worked full time at my job up until December 16th. Still I was thinking I had at least another week to get everything perfect. So you can imagine our surprise to get the most important phone call we had ever gotten just two days later on Sunday December 18 2005.

We had just gotten home from church when my cell phone rang. It was our Birth Mother's Mom letting us know "we're in labor." Tears immediately started rushing down my cheeks, I was so overcome with emotion I could hardly speak. After hanging up the phone there was a moment of silence...then panic! What do we do now?? It took awhile but we finally gained composure...well as much composure you can gain after hearing the most wonderful news. At nine o'clock that night our phone rang again.

"She's here!" Our baby was finally here. All 7lbs 2 ounces, 20 3/4 inches of her, born at 6:34pm on Sunday December 18, 2005.

We were anxious to leave right away but we were stuck in the middle of an ice storm. So we decided to spend the rest of the night packing up everything any one baby could ever need. After all Our daughter was born one state away and we had no idea how long the state would make us stay there until we got the all clear to be able to go home. The next morning we ventured out on our five hour drive. Finally we arrived at our destination and our Birth Mother's case worker called us. He informed us that our Birth mother wanted us to come see the baby...that night. We quickly headed straight out the door. Stopping only to buy a bouquet of flowers. Upon arriving at the hospital we met the caseworker and proceeded up to the maternity unit, stopping at the door of our Birth Mother's hospital room. I was not prepared for the emotions I would feel after walking through that door. I don't think anyone could ever be prepared for that.

The first person I saw after walking into that room was our Birth Mother's Mom. We embraced for a long time and wept. I then headed straight for our Birth Mom and hugged her....by this time I was sobbing. I didn't even notice the tiny bundle next to the hospital bed until someone said "would you like to hold your daughter." My husband and I picked up our baby girl and just starred at this precious wonder. We were able to take our babe into a room where just the three of us could spend some time together.

Never had I seen a baby more beautiful than she.

After a couple hours we felt it was time to let our Birthmother be with the baby. We wrapped her up, gave her a kiss, and said good bye. We would be back tomorrow for placement but leaving our little girl was so hard. We had waited a long time for this. Not as long as most couples but when you yearn for something for so long, any amount of waiting can seem like forever. Thankfully, in a matter of hours we would be united again...this time forever.

Waiting For Our Angel

We had three and a half months to get ready to welcome a new baby into our home. Even though we were so overcome with joy, those few months were very difficult. Mainly because we were so anxious to finally meet our baby girl, to finally be a family. But...we were also afraid. Afraid of the unknown, afraid that our birth mom would change her mind, afraid that after all we had been through we would end up, in the end, empty handed. Adoption is an incredibly emotional experience. An experience that requires more faith than I thought I had. It is during times like these that you really come to understand how much our Father in Heaven loves you, and how strong you really are.

Just before Thanksgiving we meet with our birth mother again. In the meantime we had been communicating via email about once a week. She would update us on how she was feeling, and the progress of the baby. During this time she had asked us what we had decided to name our daughter. Oh how we love our birth mother. She let us choose our baby's name. That meant so much to us. During our visit with our birth mother we were able to meet her parents and younger brother. We had dinner at her home, and looked through photo albums of her as a young child. While at dinner our birth mothers Mom had expressed her feeling to us. She was grateful that her daughter had chosen to follow the prophets counsel, and after meeting my husband and I she felt so at peace with the decision to have us raise this sweet spirit. There was not a dry eye at that table, and the spirit felt was so strong. It was so surreal to look at our birth mom's growing belly and know that our little girl was in there. We could feel her spirit, and we couldn't wait to finally hold our little one. That wait would be over sooner than we thought...

How It All Began...

My husband and I were married in October 2002. 10 months later we decided that we wanted to start our family. Like many other couples we were excited about what the future had in store for us and our children. Little did we know that it would be a long journey getting our children here. After a year of "trying" we sought medical advice. Some basic tests were done and everything looked fine. Another year passed, and many tears shed. What is wrong with us?? Was a question I asked myself over and over again. The emotional turmoil I felt was at times unbearable. It didn't seem fair...but soon, HE would make it fair. Heavenly Father was mindful of us.

We did not exhaust our efforts with infertility treatments. Our immediate decision was to adopt. We felt very strongly that there was a special spirit waiting to be part of our family through adoption. The process was started. We took our time filing out all the paperwork....longer than most couples. We thought we were just procrastinators...little did we know it was all part of a greater plan.

After about 6 months My sister-in-law called us up and asked if we had finished our paperwork for the agency. We informed her that we were not quite done. She told us of a girl she knew who was planning on placing her baby and wanted to meet us. My heart skipped a beat...literally. By now we had been trying for two years to have a baby.

The following month we met our birth mother for the first time. Watching her walk up to the picnic table and seeing her cute 20 week pregnant belly was a very special experience for us. That was our baby in her belly...we just didn't know it yet. Our meeting was amazing. It felt like we had known her forever. We talked for awhile and as we started to leave my husband said something to her I will never forget. He expressed to her our desire to have a child and be a family. We hugged, exchanged emails and parted ways. As soon as we got home we emailed her and let her know how thankful we were that she took the time to meet us, and if she had any questions, to please feel free to ask. A week passed and we heard nothing. However, on September 1st, while I was at work, I saw I had a new message.

This message would change our life.

It was from our birth mother. In it she said that we were to be the parents of her baby girl.

We were chosen even before the agency had accepted us.

Of course my husband and I quickly finished the last bits of paperwork, and on september 6th 2005 we were cleared to become adoptive parents.

Telling our story...

Almost two years ago we experienced the most incredible event. The adoption of our little girl. I feel inspired to share our story, our insights, our emotional pain, in hopes that someone, somewhere, will come to know that they are not alone. That there is somebody who has walked the path they are about to tread.